Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

While on our pregnancy journey, my husband and I decided that it would be more beneficial to us to have a midwife and have our little one at home. While we did not want to get ultrasounds, I was still sort of in disbelief. While I trusted God, I still had a hard time comprehending that there was a baby growing inside of me, so we decided to go ahead and get the ultrasound, mainly for my own peace of mind. I will never forget that moment. We walked into the room to meet with the ultrasound technician. I remember being overcome with so many emotions. As I mentioned, I was still in disbelief that there was someone growing inside of me. There I lay, with my husband on my left side and our midwife standing near the technician. My heart was pounding so hard as we waited to see the image on the screen. To my amazement, our little baby was on the screen, just bouncing around like a jelly bean. Right then and there, I fell in love even more. I'll never forget seeing our little one's arms and legs just moving all over the place. Tears of joy filled my eyes as I saw the precious gift God gave us moving around inside of me. That ultrasound took place around 11 weeks. I can tell you with 100% certainty that these little ones are not just clumps of cells, they are babies, blessings from God.

As the weeks went by, my belly grew. At our 20 week visit, we declined the ultrasound, mainly because we did not want to know the sex of our baby and we wanted our experience to be as natural as possible. As our midwife told us, "God will provide you with what you need," so I put my trust in Him. Every visit, our little jelly bean was growing stronger. Hearing that little heartbeat never got old. I read books and maintained a balanced diet to ensure that our little one would have all of their nutrients to stay strong, even suffering with taking my prenatals (I hate swallowing pills). While working, I made sure not to do any heavy lifting or anything that could cause harm to our precious cargo.

As time went by, my belly grew and before I knew it, the due date had arrived, which was Super Bowl Sunday. My biggest fear was my mom, who had come for the birth of her first grandchild, getting too excited watching that it triggered the baby to come. Needless to say, that did not happen. A few days later, a huge winter storm hit. I prayed that our little one did not decide to make an appearance then. Nothing happened. I was still working but took time off from my clinical to ensure I did not have any added stress. I also didn't want to go into labor while in a session with a client. Since there was still no baby, our midwife recommended an ultrasound to ensure that everything was still okay. Since we didn't want to know the baby's sex, the technician did not scan the baby's lower half. My husband and I did not look at the screen since we didn't want to get any hints at what our baby looked like. All of a sudden, I heard the technician say, "Wow, look at all that hair." Curiosity got the best of me and I took a peek. It was then I saw such a beautiful head with a lot of hair floating around in my fluid. I could do nothing but smile. Our baby was in the right position and was lowering into my pelvis. Our midwife informed us that our next meeting would be at our home to deliver a baby; she was right.

I went into labor around 1am on that Sunday morning. Let me tell you, that is a pain that I will never forget. That night, the baby still hadn't arrived. The midwife told me to try and get some sleep because baby would arrive soon. The next day, I still hadn't dilated any further, so it was time to go to the hospital. Still, I trusted in the Lord that we would have a healthy baby. On March 1, 2022 around 10am, we welcomed a beautiful baby girl. I could hear the doctor saying something to my husband while cleaning her up, but I ignored all that; all I could really hear was our little girl's crying. She was handed to me and she was the most beautiful little thing I had ever seen. I smiled and kissed her and thanked God for such a perfect and healthy little girl. The hospital pediatrician, however, was concerned with her appearance. It turned out that she was born without her left foot, due to a condition called Amniotic Band Syndrome (ABS). It occurs when one of the bands in the uterus comes undone and wraps around the baby's limb or limbs, resulting in disfigured or amputated limbs. While everyone else was concerned, my husband and I were not, for she was fearfully and wonderfully made, for she was stitched together by God Himself.

A few weeks later, I was watching a documentary about a couple who refused to abort their child, even though doctors said that he would not live (I will attach the title once I remember it). A certain part stuck out to me. The baby's grandfather said that he had a dream about a particular verse. The verse was John 9:3. "When the disciples asked Jesus if the man had been born blind because of his sin or the sin of his parents, Jesus answered, "It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him." It was like God was sending me a message. Our little blessing was born with a little stump for a foot. Here we are almost a year from then and her little stump now resembles a little foot and is growing out as she gets older. Not only that, but she stands with ease and is currently trying for her first steps. Doctors think they know everything. My message is, don't put your faith in doctors, but trust in God, for nothing is impossible for Him. I share this account to help others who have children who were born with "deformities" or considered "imperfect." It was no mistake, for God is using your child to show His power. Trust in Him, for He makes no mistakes.